Compartments

 When you let two of your worlds clash, you allow a risk, a risk so dangerous it might destroy you. But something tells you to go ahead, because you want your life to be just one, instead of the many faces you've to cope with, when coming to different groups of people. The closer to heart, the higher the stakes.

 I guess this was the reason why I don't have a facebook to begin with, because life was meant to be compartmentalized; that's the way to go. The moment I decided to terminate my fb, I was already ready to seperate the many things in my life. I've been making the same mistakes over the years, and it's high time I stopped. (I don't make sense in this post.)

Only, Happy

Cause I should have thought over and over what I said,

I'm sorrry for being a jerk.
Sometimes I feel like I'm fighting one-sidedly for something not meant to be there. But who am I to judge?
I'm not even sure if you want this and I'm between dilema. Just like forever, it's like 'just the right thing' to do to hang on, but we both know better? & I'm sure you're confused as well. I know I'm always hanging on to relationships and sometimes I just don't know if it's the right thing. Especially when you're so cold anyway.
I really hope to know you and how you feel but I'd know better than to probe. I no longer know what my move is supposed to be, but I truely just want you to be truely happy.

& now I don't know what to believe in. Tell me, what to do really.
& I miss you like crazy, do you remember the times? Would the walls be gone, & I'm curious to know, what do you want.

& I'm sorry for pinning all the blame on you. 

Rubbish..!

 Finally, after so long....... I don't see anymore reason to whyy I should keep holding on. There used to be A lot. But as time goes by....... Those reasons just lost its meaning. Coz most of the reasons are nicer when two people have similar feelings towards another. And since I'm not what she's looking for.... Tough luck i Guess..?

  && I think, in the end, you can tell a man a thousand quotes...... You can't change his mind for good. It takes time. Yupp! Time. It heals all wounds. Or maybe stitches would.... Hehehehe!

  This holiday is....... so empty. I actually had like A LOT of things that I have plan and wanna go ON. But...... Well let say..... Things don't go your way every time. The most heart shattering one is My Mount Rinjani hopes and dreams. I really wanna go up that one...!! But..... Time doesn't permit. Plus the people I going with aren't really up for it. Haizz. I think I'm going for it during June holidays. Its quite expensive anyways. But I heard its Awesome!

 

I'm rubbish.. See Ya..! =D

The soul that walks alone may sometimes see beauty

Cause most of the Time, I'm a joke

 Everyone has their own short comings and I think it's high time we start learning to accept them, or even embrace them. Or at least make an effort. I fall into the same unpleasant category of judgmental people but at least I'm attempting. It may be hard sometimes, but I feel that's how humanity should be. I guess that's the problem with us society after all. We pick out peoples' faults and blame people for them. But who doesn't want to be perfect? Right...?

  Things ain't that well..... Just realize I got a lot of things to be done and am just too lazy for anything. More like too tired..? I dunno. Things went quite well with my team lately. Although i'm the cause for quite some faults and wrongdoings, they didn't shun me like they would usually do. I guess I'm finally a part of them. && I just wanna say I really Have An Awesome Team =D

 My running is seriously not going anywhere.... I am left with 70+ days and I have horrible training these days && my Left Knee is CRAPPING UP!!  I don't know how I'm gonna do this uhhs! Probably drop dead halfway through the marathon? Haizzz... I'm gonna disappoint many people. I don't think I have the guts to face those people I once call My "family ehhs.... I think its just me ehhs. I'm trained to ruin my own life.... How CooL is that..?

Ohh Yea! I missed out something important in My "I am Still Where I Am 3 Years Ago" list...
Read the previous post if you don't understand uhhs.

I am still in Love with the same person 3 years ago. And the situation haven't change. Much...... Even though i used to have a girlfriend back then. Its complicated. Don't ask me much. And Don't Judge Me. You don't have the rights. Coz I told you to read this with an open Mind......



Peace out yeaa..?

What hurts the most,
was being so close.
Having so much to say,
Watching you walk away.

Its me.... I'm BACK

 I know I have forgotten about this beautiful place for way too long already. And i'm really sorry. A lot of things were happening. Maybe too many things. Right now, its my own free time finally. And i have too many things to talk about.

Where Am I right Now..?
 I don't mean literally..... I meant where in life am i right now..? One way to look at it is like, I'm in singapore Poly and going towards my 2nd year.

But to look at it from my view....... I just realised I AM EXACTLY WHERE I AM 3 YEARS AGO..!! know whyy....?
Lets take a look.

I'm still in the same waterpolo team I was back then. Even though I've made A LOT of plans to move to club playing and finally the national team, I'm still here.......in the youth team and my final year..! If I don't do something this year, my waterpolo career is OVER~

As for my running? I'm still doing the same old shits from back then. And up to now, I haven't got a clear break though of where I am actually at.... (aside for my first upcoming marathon) looking at my other running buddies, I realise they have really took running to another level..... And I think I'm jealous..? They are really where I once dreamt of being.......

And as for my adventures? Yeaa, joining SP Adventurer was quite CooL..! However, looking at my progress towards my life long goal..... I'm still doing tiny puny mountains around South East Asia. Plus, i'm still stuck in the 4800m+ height...! I wanna go higher. I wanna go further..!

The only different thing between right now and back then...?
I'm single right now

Right Now..!
I'm kinda anxiously waiting for my 2nd semester results to be out. Have some high hopes about some modules.... Hope to pull my GPA up a huge mountain ehhs?
Its holiday right now....... can't wait to fill my time up with sandy beaches of east coast every night.... But time doesn't permit such great times anymore..... I'm kinda swamped with so many stuffs..! Plus I ran into A Lot of problems these days....

I don't wanna post much.... But I'll be back for more.....

Plus right now.....!! Russia Is AWESOME!!

And through it all, the fact remains the same
We choose to fall 'cause we don't wanna change
The higher we climb, the harder we fall